“It is not good that the man should be alone” versus the words of Paul

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There are young people that ask themselves whether they should marry or not. Is it not more correct and better not to marry, and to serve the Lord without concerns?

 

When we look at the words of the Apostle Paul, which are the words of the Living God, we find there the counsel that it is better to remain single and not to marry, in order to serve the Lord without distraction - 1 Corinthians 7:35. He who has a desire in his heart to serve God feels that God is calling him to remain single when he reads these verses.

 

I am not trying to convince you that it is not so, but I want you to think about a few points, and to examine yourself to see whether truly God is calling you to remain single.

 

Paul also wrote other verses, for example:

“Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” 1 Corinthians 7:2

“It is better to marry than to burn.” 1 Corinthians 7:9

“I will therefore that the younger women marry” 1 Timothy 5:14

All the disciples of Jesus were married. Did they not serve the Lord? Indeed even Philip who was an evangelist was married (it is written that he had daughters – Acts 21:8-9)

Paul gives you a test by which you can know whether you are capable of remaining alone in order to serve the Lord:

“But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.” 1 Corinthians 7:9

 

Reality check:

You need to remember that you are not better or stronger than others are. Oftentimes young believers look at those older than themselves and think that they are better or stronger, but when they get older they find out that they are flesh and blood with weaknesses. I will ask you to look at those very individuals that you know, who are serving God in an active way, and ask yourself: how many of them are married, and how many are single? Moreover, if you look at the ones that remained single for many years, you will find that the loneliness did not affect most of them in a positive way, and you will see that truly “It is not good that the man should be alone” Genesis 2:18.

 

Reality and the Scriptures show us that most of the believers did not remain single, and many of those that remained alone did not necessarily serve God more than others that were married. I believe that there are only a few believers to whom God did indeed give this gift to remain single in order to be able to serve Him without any hindrance. The important question is: “Are you one of those few?” Before saying yes, examine yourself in the light of the points that I raised. If you find that you did not receive the gift to remain alone, it does not mean that you won’t be able to serve God. Married individuals serve God in a different way, which is also of no less importance.

 

The danger is when a young believer thinks that he or she is supposed to remain single, when in fact God is not calling them to this. What is the danger in this? The danger is that one day that same believer will find out that this is in fact not what God had planned for them. And they will want to get married. But what? Now they are no longer young, the person that they perhaps would have been willing to marry is now married to another, and only singles that they don’t like all that much are still available, and they are then likely to marry an unbeliever. And what is the result? Instead of serving the Lord with all your time, you waste the rest of your life in a marriage that God did not want for you, and you are chained down when it comes to service for God.

 

Thus it is very important while you are still young, to discern what is indeed your gift, out of an understanding that very few are the believers which indeed have this gift to remain single.